The way we meet new people, strike up friendships and relationships has changed. Dating apps have no doubt simplified the process for Gen Z. But people change. Life isn’t always a bed of roses. People change. People often become insensitive and ‘stash’ their SO (significant other) or ‘ghost’ them.
But guess what?! You can tackle the most difficult situation, if you know what is happening to you and what your partner is thinking.
Stashing
Stash (v.): to store something safely in a hidden or secret place.
When your SO doesn’t want you to tag them in Instagram memes, doesn’t comment on your photos and doesn’t introduce you to their family and friends, it’s likely that you’re being stashed. That is, being kept away from public eye. He/she wants you but isn’t ready to make t official just yet.
Ghosting
Ghosting is when somebody you liked or had a crush on suddenly goes Poof! without even giving a valid reason for their absence from social media. They don’t reply to your texts, don’t return your calls and may even block you.
Zombieing
It’s called zombie-ing when the person who ghosted you suddenly comes back again into your life. Such people act as if nothing has happened and everything has been normal all along. Zombies usually try to get back to you with an unexpected ‘Hey!’ message or spamming you with calls. They may also begin by liking all your posts on social media.
Benching
Guys are known to sit on the fence. Yeah, it takes some time to articulate what it is that they really want. This means it’s difficult for them to make up their minds about the girl they are seeing. If you try to have “the talk” with your partner and are left feeling like a back-up option, your SO is benching. The term has originated from reserve sports players sitting on benches. This just means that they are likely to keep you hanging and continue looking around. They’ll come back to you – when they don’t find anybody better.
Catch-and-Release
“It’s the thrill of the chase, baby!” People who practise catch-and-release will totally identify with this statement. Such creeps invest all their time and energy in sending flirty texts. They will go to great lengths to impress you. When they realise you’ve fallen head over heels for them, the messages will cease. Doing this gives a boost to their false sense of self.
Breadcrumbing
When you throw crumbs to the birds, they’ll swoop down and have their fill. This also happens in the virtual world (though not literally!). Your crush may send you messages that border on flirtation, making you assume that you’re being pursued. However, when they don’t show up as promised and make only the bare minimum efforts to keep the relationship alive, they’re throwing breadcrumbs to just keep you interested and not shatter the status quo.
Cushioning
A cushion feels oh-so-comfy after a tired day. When things start falling apart and a relationship hits a rocky patch, it’s almost always headed for a breakup. Many people recognise the signs early on and start talking and flirting with other guys/girls to cushion the blow when it comes. However, neither of the partners actually initiates the breakup. Thus, both are left with a non-monogamous relationship staring them in the face.
Catfishing
Remember your mom telling you, “Don’t talk to strangers!” when you first started using Facebook? Catfishing is luring a fish with a worm on the hook. Only that this is unfortunately applied to humans too. Such people lure a girl/guy by pretending to be desirable on an online dating platform. They may have pics of their abs and six-pack, often without a face.
Slow Fade
When your SO slowly fades out of your life by occasionally leaving your texts and calls unanswered, it’s called ‘Slow Fade’. This is a milder form of ghosting where the person isn’t interested in taking things forward, but doesn’t want to cut contact abruptly. Slowly, they’ll cancel plans and talk vaguely about meeting again. Eventually, it becomes awkward to even be ‘just friends’.
Simply Vaishnavi 