Au(in)ty Acid


I know many women called aunties in India who are my friends’ mothers, neighbours and ex-neighbours. I was wondering the other day, how peculiar some qualities are to these aunties. So, I kinda segregated them into groups, take a look-

•Thinking ill of others aunty

This is that aunty whom we all despise. The gossip-monger aunty, who like Devarishi Narada believes in playing postman, in the process, hating everyone who seems happy. She thinks up new ways to torment her neighbours and others. And when she realises that it’s not affecting you(or at least you don’t show her that it does), it all comes to a halt. Who knows, there may be some aunties practising voodoo or black magic, for that matter.

•Very open about her personal life aunty

This aunty is my personal favourite. I can’t help laughing at the ease with which she shares her personal details with you, either in person or on social media. Once she’d uploaded her wedding photograph as her dp, whereupon I remarked that she was looking quite young then. That was the spark and she commenced, typing how she had been orphaned in her youth and thus, married off by her grandmother before 21. On Facebook, she commented on one of my shares that she hadn’t invited many people to her wedding as all they did was wait for the food and leave with bulging stomachs.

•Making you feel like her family member aunty

Ah, an innocent, down-to-earth aunty. One of my friends’ mother. I have gone on long walks with her, have been invited a couple of times to her home and have shared quite a good rapport with her. I was so frank once, she asked me whether I would prefer tea to milk, and I said, “Yes, surely, but not now, later.” The way I would talk to my Mom.

•Idolising you aunty

This aunty is the one who admires you greatly for what makes you and urges her kids to follow the same, in my case: reading books. She asserted that the habit of reading ought to be developed by every person from a young age itself. And surprisingly, her kids too, agreed with her.

•Dual minded aunty

Madam seems to be always in two minds. She cannot for her life come to a definite decision upon a matter at hand. She tells herself something and ends up doing something else.

•Talkative aunty

Such aunties are the pride of any gathering, be it birthday, marriage anniversery, anything. We may cease to hear what she’s saying but poor soul wouldn’t exert control over her tongue. Their absence would turn a joyous occasion into a miserable one. Difficult to escape this aunty.

•Reserved aunty

Reserved aunty doesn’t talk much, quite the opposite of talkative aunty. She keeps to herself and appears aloof. People think twice before speaking to her. It’s tough to decipher what is going on in that little brain of hers. This is a rare piece.

In India, Women and Cooking always go together!

Indian Aunty Acid! 

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